English for Today by Ganiu Abisoye Bamgbose (Dr GAB)
The Grammar of Etiquette
Speaker A: You care for coffee?
Speaker B: ~Yes, thanks~ (nonstandard).
Speaker B: Yes, please (standard).
Speaker B: No, thanks (standard).
In English etiquette, yes collocates with please and no collocates with thanks.
Speaker A: Do you mind a cup of tea?
Speaker B: ~Yes, please! I want it hot~ (nonstandard).
Speaker B: No, please! I want it hot (standard).
When the expression “Do you mind” is used, no is the response when one wants the offer and yes is the response when one does not want the offer.
GAB
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